With nearly 10,000 people following my monthly blog, I’m frequently asked to speak and present at various events. Many of the workshops, seminars and evening engagements include a “winner, winner chicken dinner,” which tickled my funny bone.
At a June luncheon I told an impromptu chicken joke which produced a hearty chuckle. The next mealtime talk I told two chicken jokes and the laughs lingered. Forget American Idol, I was quickly becoming a rising star on Chicken Idol.
I’m happy to share some of my best chicken material. I prefer clean corny (punny) humor, which matches my hammy delivery style. Use these one-liners and my favorite chicken joke at your own risk.
– Scientists agree that a chicken crossing the road is called “poultry in motion.”
– My nephew confirmed his chicken cross the playground to get to the other slide.
– Beethoven disliked chickens because they keep chant, ”Bach, Bach, Bach.”
– You get the best chicken jokes from a yolk book.
– It is easy for baby chickens to talk because talk is cheep.
– Chickens will never get rich because they work for chicken feed.
– Mathematicians theorize chickens cross a Mobius strip to stay on the same side.
– Parents don’t want chicken farms near schools, so pupils don’t hear fowl language.
A chicken walks into a library and says to the librarian “book, book, book,” so the librarian gives the chicken three books and it walks out.
Ten minutes later, the chicken walks in again and says “book, book, book,” so once again, the librarian gives the chicken three books and it walks out.
Ten minutes later, the chicken comes back in and says “book, book, book,” so the librarian gives the chicken three books and it walks out. But this time the librarian follows the chicken.
She follows the chicken across the street into the park and watches it hand the books one at a time to a frog. The frog put on his glasses and said, “readit, readit, readit.”
Your Turn: What’s your favorite chicken joke?